


heaven is a place on earth with you

by angstinspace



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: AU where Adam doesn't die, Canon Divergence, M/M, POV Shiro (Voltron), adashi, broganes, canonverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-16 15:20:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17552180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstinspace/pseuds/angstinspace
Summary: “What doesAdammean?”Adam doesn’t answer immediately, searching Shiro’s face like he’s trying to find a deeper meaning behind the question. Then he sighs, leaning back against the bike so their shoulders touch. He turns away, lifting his face towards the stars.“It just meansearth,” he says at last. “Pretty boring, right?”Shiro studies Adam’s profile in the moonlight, contemplating the name and its definition.Adam. Earth. It feels right, somehow. Grounding, secure, safe. Like coming home for the first time in years.or, how Shiro finds his way home.





	heaven is a place on earth with you

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this fic for my dear friend [casey](https://twitter.com/kevinkevinsonnn) whom i love and adore! happy late bday casey and i hope you like this fic. :'')
> 
> notes:
> 
> \- this is basically canon compliant except for the canon divergence where adam doesn't die lmao  
> \- it kinda skips around in time but uh hopefully it makes sense!  
> \- warning for some implied gore but like....nothing really "shown"   
> \- the title comes from "[video games](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cE6wxDqdOV0)" by lana del rey

Out in the arena, they yell for blood.

The shouts and jeers combine into a deafening roar, a rolling thunderstorm of alien voices yelling for _more, more_. Demanding to see nightmares play out before their eyes, to see bodies twisted and broken, to see their victims painted across the dust. 

Shiro lets the noise wash over him, until it blends with the dull rushing sound in his ears. He feels oddly calm, despite the adrenaline spiking through his veins. His jaw sets in determination, even as he hears the horrific noises coming from the colosseum, just beyond his line of vision––an incoherent cry cut short by a sickening crunch.

The thunderous footsteps of something massive pace the arena. The roar of the crowd only swells at the spectacle, unsatiated even after drinking in the sight of another life taken.

A silhouette stands at the mouth of the arena––Matt Holt, shrouded in his tattered prison uniform, trembling and murmuring. His words are barely audible, but Shiro can make out enough to understand the frantic pleas. Begging for his life, his family.

“You can do this.” The empty words leave a bitter taste on Shiro’s tongue as he utters them. He sees Matt’s narrow frame, how his shoulder blades stick out from under his clothes. 

Outside, they yell for the next prisoner to be brought forth. The guards crowd forward, right towards Matt. Something snaps in Shiro then, gaze flitting between the aliens’ weapons and Matt’s desperately retreating form.

He yells, barreling forward. The scene unfolds in snapshots: the weapon in his hands, the horrible cracking noise before Matt hits the ground. Then Shiro is crouching over him, cruel and animalistic, something sharp twisting in his gut when he sees the terrified look on Matt’s face. Like he’s staring up at a complete stranger. 

“Take care of your father,” Shiro manages to say, before hands grab him and the bright dusty air of the arena hits his eyes.

If they want blood, he’ll show them blood.

––

Two years.

The verdict was handed to him like a pair of tarnished coins dropped into his palm. Spoken with hushed voices and bowed heads, in the harsh light of a white room. Permeated with the smell of chemicals. 

_Two years_.

He once saw it as a sentence, etched into the life lines on his palms, a ticking time bomb inside his ribcage. Now he sees it as a challenge. With each monster he fell, he looks into the eyes of each person who told him he would fail. Every condescending sneer and pitying look, cut down with the swing of a blade. 

Soon the onlookers that once wanted to see him die are now crying for his victory. _Champion_. The name is shouted hoarsely from the stands and whispered fearfully among his fellow prisoners. It becomes a suit of armor that he dons each day when he wakes, when the hands first grab him and shove him out into the light.

At night, he lets it roll from his shoulders and slip to the floor. In the darkness, he erases the empty title of _champion_ in favor of ones that tether him to earth. Pilot, astronaut, senior officer. Friend, lover.

Takashi Shirogane. 

––

“What does it mean?” Adam asks him. “ _Takashi_ , that is.”

Something about the sound of his full name on Adam’s lips makes Shiro feel like someone has reached into his chest and gripped at his heart. “Noble,” he manages to answer. “Prosperous. Something like that.” 

Adam grins crookedly, brown eyes alight behind his glasses. “I like it.”

Warmth blossoms in Shiro’s chest and spreads to his extremities, and right then he knows he’s hopelessly in love. He knows, under the sweeping desert sky alight with stars, as he leans back against his parked hoverbike and laughs––because what else are you supposed to do, at such a staggering revelation?

“Thanks,” he says. “You can call me that, if you want to.”

It’s clear in Adam’s expression, in the way his smile falters for a moment, that he realizes this is not an offer to be taken lightly. “I think I will.”

Silence settles over them as their eyes lock, as Shiro thinks of all the things he could say if he had the courage, of all the things he could do. 

Instead he merely asks, “What does _Adam_ mean?” 

Adam doesn’t answer immediately, searching Shiro’s face like he’s trying to find a deeper meaning behind the question. Then he sighs, leaning back against the bike so their shoulders touch. He turns away, lifting his face towards the stars.

“It just means _earth_ ,” he says at last. “Pretty boring, right?”

Shiro studies Adam’s profile in the moonlight, contemplating the name and its definition. _Adam. Earth_. It feels right, somehow. Grounding, secure, safe. Like coming home for the first time in years. 

“No,” he says quietly, sincerely. “I like it.” 

––

He shouldn’t have left them behind. It’s the thought that comes back to haunt him over and over again, through everything.

Adam with his head bowed and hands clenched, telling him he had nothing he needed to prove. Adam, waking up next to him with tousled hair and a sleepy smile. 

And Keith … Keith, who had practically become his younger brother. Keith with bloodied knuckles, with a rare smile, with that fire in his eyes every time he flew in the simulator. Keith’s voice shaking as he confessed, _“You know how you feel about Adam? Well, I—I think I feel that way about boys, too.”_

Neither of them wanted him to go, their eyes turning to steel at the news. He knew that they wouldn’t understand it––that he wasn’t trying to abandon them, that he wasn’t trying to prove something to anyone except himself––but it stung. It still does. 

Every day, he remembers the gut-wrenching feeling of watching Earth get farther and farther away––a sudden fear that everyone who doubted him had been right, that he’d made a mistake, that he was leaving behind the people who mattered most to him. His family. His world.

And now he doesn’t know if he’ll ever return.

––

He barely feels it when it happens, so numbed by shock and adrenaline that the unimaginable pain fades to the back of his mind. All he knows is that suddenly he’s lying on the ground, dust stinging his eyes and the bright lights above him shifting in and out of focus. The intense roar of the crowd blends seamlessly with the rushing sound in his ears, a voice in his head yelling for him to _get up, get up_ …

It’s strange, because he can feel where his arm was only minutes ago––an electric tingling sensation coursing through the phantom limb. But when he manages to turn his head, there’s nothing there except an alarming crimson stain on the ground, and beyond that the remnants of the fallen robeast he somehow still managed to defeat. 

Even as his vision darkens, he clings to the memories that have gotten him through each battle. Brown eyes. Gentle hands. Something to return to once he survives this, because he _will_. 

“Adam,” he says weakly. 

Everything goes black.

––

What happens after that is a dark string of memories he'd rather forget––long periods of oblivion punctuated by the sharp sting of awakening. The burning smell of chemicals, blurry forms hovering over him, bright lights blinding him. His phantom limb suddenly replaced by a cold, metallic weapon.

He can no longer distinguish between nightmares and reality, so he thinks he might be dreaming when someone finally tears him free, shakes him, tells him to run. It only hits him once he’s stumbling down the narrow corridor, breaths scraping in and out of his lungs, adrenaline coursing through his veins. 

Even then, it doesn’t feel real until he’s thrown himself into the escape pod, until he’s hurtling through space towards the destination he’s been dreaming of for so long.

–– 

The irony is that he doesn’t get to stay. It’s less than a day before he’s careening back into space again––this time in a sentient robotic lion, of all things––and thrown into the midst of war. 

But at least this time, he goes with a greater sense of purpose, with the title of _paladin_ which feels more earned than the hollow title of _champion_. He goes with four others, who he swears he will never let down. 

And he fights to keep that promise in any way he can, even in the fiery midst of battle, in the crushing silence of space. 

It won’t be like last time.

––

When they finally return to Earth again, Takashi Shirogane is a new man. Literally. He’s still growing accustomed to the feeling of being in his cloned body––a disorienting feeling like he’s himself but also not, with his hair now completely white, and a brand new prosthetic arm. 

There are still meetings to attend, hands to shake, loose ends to be tied, but somehow Shiro finally finds the time to go out into the desert on his own. It’s been years now, and he’s dreamed of it for so long, that it feels surreal to finally be back––tipping his head back to gaze at the stars, remembering the days when he dreamed of exploring them. He can’t help but chuckle a little at the thought. _I had no idea_.

“Takashi?” 

The voice startles him, and he turns around to find a man standing a small distance from him. Shiro recognizes him immediately, even though it’s been a couple of years, even though his hair has gotten shorter and he’s wearing a different pair of glasses with darker frames. 

“Adam.”

It comes out more quietly than he means it to––but it’s difficult to speak at all when he feels like his heart is clawing its way up into his throat. The ground feels like it’s heaving underneath him, and it’s a miracle he manages to stay on his feet.

Shiro has imagined this moment, longed for it, for what feels like an eternity, and this isn’t at all what he had pictured: the two of them just standing there, unmoving, staring at each other like strangers. 

Adam takes in the sight of him slowly, wide-eyed, and Shiro’s head reels as he struggles to come up with something to say. He almost feels the need to apologize, to acknowledge how different he must look. And then there’s the question of how Adam even knew he would be here––but he thinks he knows the answer. It’s the same spot where they’ve always found each other, where they once explained the meanings of their names under the stars, where they kissed for the first time the night after their graduation. 

There are so many things Shiro could say, but nothing seems like enough.

But then there’s a disbelieving smile on Adam’s face and a glimmer of tears in his eyes. He rushes forward and Shiro meets him halfway. 

Later there will be more time for words. For apologies, for confessions, for stories to be told. But for now, this is enough: just the two of them, shaking and embracing under the desert sky. It may not be perfect, but Shiro is exactly where he wants to be. 

Alive, safe, and home.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading, and once again HAPPY BDAY CASEY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!! ♡
> 
> –
> 
> [my other fics](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstinspace/works) // [tumblr](http://angst-in-space.tumblr.com/) // [twitter](https://twitter.com/angst_in_space) // [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/angst_in_space)


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